For all 15 leading causes of death, except Alzheimer’s, men and boys live sicker and die sooner than women and girls. We suffer everything from arthritis and multiple sclerosis to heart disease and cancer.
We don’t have to wait for a major breakthrough in medical technology to save millions of lives. We could do it right now simply by helping men live as long and well as women. In fact, says Randolph Nesse, M.D. and Daniel J. Kruger, PhD., “Over 375,000 lives would be saved in a single year in the U.S. alone if men’s risk of dying was as low as women’s.” Dr. Nesse concludes, “If you could make male mortality rates the same as female rates, you would do more good than curing cancer.”
Research studies show that 80-90% of all illnesses are stress related. We can’t eliminate stress from our lives, but we can deal more effectively with chronic stress. Although both men and women are affected by stress, men are particularly vulnerable. Reducing stress in males can save millions of men’s lives and impact the lives of millions of women and children.
Here are some things you can do now to help yourself and those you love:
- Sign up for the Men’s Health Grand Rounds Webinar (Starts June 23, 2014) and learn the latest information from 20 of the world’s leading experts. It’s free.
- Learn how my book Stress Relief for Men can help you eliminate chronic stress.
- Watch me at EnTheos share 10 Big Ideas that can save lives.
Here’s a sample:
- Recognize your brain is Velcro for the bad, but Teflon for the good
Most modern-day stress is caused by the anxieties and worries that constantly run through our minds. Why is that? Neuroscience demonstrates that our brains are actually wired to worry. “The brain is good at learning from bad experiences, but bad about learning from the good ones,” says neuropsychologist Dr. Rick Hanson. During our hunter-gatherer past, focusing on all the negative things that could happen kept us alive. Now it just wears us down. Knowing there is a “negativity bias” in the brain is the first step in freeing us.
- Understand we all suffer paper tiger paranoia.
“Our ancestors could make two kinds of mistakes,” says Dr. Hanson. (1) Thinking there was a tiger in the bushes when there wasn’t one, and (2) Thinking there was no tiger in the bushes when there actually was one. The cost of the first mistake was needless stress, while the cost of the second one was death. Consequently, we evolved to make the first mistake a thousand times to avoid making the second mistake even once.” As a result says Hanson, the default setting of the brain is to overestimate threats and underestimate our abilities to cope with stress.
- “Live life as if everything is rigged in your favor.” Arianna Huffington quoting Rumi.
Most of the things that trigger our fears are subconscious. They operate in the background out of our awareness. Our ancestors survived in a hostile environment because they paid attention to the signs of tiger even when they weren’t present. But now we live in a world where our fears are constantly being triggered. But the truth is, most of what surrounds us is good. If we live our lives as though everything is for our better good, we live more realistically and with less stress.
- Learn that there is no stress in the present.
There is a real difference between fear and anxiety. Fear alerts us that there is a threat to our well-being. It is a call to action. Anxiety and worry cause us to ruminate about all the possible things that could go wrong in the future (the negativity bias again). There is never a feeling of stress in the present moment. A good way to get “out of our heads” and into the present moment is to ask ourselves, “how are things now? The answer will always be (unless you’re running for your life), fine now…but… No buts, things are fine now!
- Turn off the electronics and get out in nature.
For most of human history we lived in small human groups surrounded by nature. Now we spend a lot of time cut off from nature and disconnected from other people. We are connected to computers, televisions, telephones, etc. all of which are constantly asking for our attention. Each one causes a little shot of adrenaline. Is this one a threat? Is this one important? Do I need to do something? Turn off your electronics, get out in nature. The sun, the wind, the birds, the animals will welcome you and they won’t demand your attention.
- Don’t chew on your stress, get moving.
Our bodies are built to deal with stress through movement. When a real tiger came out of the bush we fought or we fled. We didn’t sit and stew. We didn’t chew on our worries and ruminate about all the bad things that could befall us. Since stress is a part of life, movement must be a part of life. Walking is the best exercise we can engage. It will reduce stress, guaranteed. Walk in nature and walk with others and you add additional stress-relieving benefits.
- Balance heart and brain using Heart Coherence.
There’s a reason that heart disease kills more men and women than anything else. Stress causes the rhythms of the heart to become jagged and irregular. For centuries, the heart has been considered the source of emotion, courage and wisdom. At the Institute of HeartMath (IHM) research shows that sincere positive feelings, like love, care, gratitude, appreciation, compassion or joy, smooth out our heart rhythm into a harmonious coherent pattern. “Heart coherence” can be learned and practiced to easily reduce the effects of stress.
- Tap away stress.
Many of us carry stress from past trauma from earlier relationships or from the family we grew up in. EFT or tapping is an energy healing technique that can remove the emotional pain that so many of us carry. In describing tapping neuroscientist Candace Pert says, “EFT and other energy healing practices are designed to deliberately shift the molecules of emotion. These practices have three distinct advantages over psychiatric medications. They are noninvasive, highly specific, and have no side effects.”
- Never stress by yourself.
When we feel stressed, many of us want to withdraw. We feel no one would want to be around us when we feel overwhelmed with the stresses of life. Men, and sometimes women, often feel that they have to work things out themselves. Too often we become trapped inside our own worrying minds going over and over the things that stress us. It’s always better to share your concerns. Things usually improve when we share our pain with someone we can trust.
10. Practice sex-linked stress relief.
Men and women often deal with stress differently. Women are more likely to become emotionally distraught and talk about it with a friend or relative. Men are more likely to cover their feelings and busy themselves with other activities or escapes. I’ve found that men can learn to deal with stress more effectively by learning from women. Sometimes it’s good to let your feelings out and share them with others. But women can also learn from men. Sometimes it’s better not to emote and talk, but to keep feelings under wraps and get involved in positive action. Both can benefit from helping others, rather than being caught up with ourselves.
Please join me for the free Men’s Health Grand Rounds.
Simplify, Simplify, Simplify. Get the clutter out of your life. Eliminate the surplus. Don’t seek happiness through acquisition. Much of our stress is caused purchasing too much stuff and then trying to pay for it or managing excess debt.
Thomas, thanks for your thoughts. I agree, simplifying and unhooking from the buy buy buy culture can be of great help.