I Am More Than My Hair: What Does It Mean For a Man or A Woman To Lose Their Hair 

“I am not my hair, I am not this skin, I am not your expectations,
I am the soul that lives within.”–India Arie

I am blessed to have a full head of hair as I celebrate the work I’ve been doing with men over the last 50 years. My son, Jemal, isn’t so lucky. He began losing his hair in his early 30s. After some years trying to comb it this way and that, he finally decided to shave it all off and take on the bald-guy look. I think it suits him well.

But losing your hair when you’re a guy is a whole different thing than losing your hair when you’re a woman. I still remember when my first wife, Jemal’s mother, began to lose her hair when she was in her 20s. We went to doctors and eventually endocrine specialists trying to find out what was causing her hair to fall out. We never found the cause and her hair remained thin. Luckily, she never lost all her hair, but it was a very difficult time for us.

Permanent hair loss affects 70% of men and 40% of women in their lifetimes. Men are more prone to a condition known as androgenic alopecia, although it can affect women as well. According to the U.S. National Library of Medicine (NLM), more than 50 percent of all men over the age of 50 will be affected by male pattern baldness to some extent.

“Hair thinning in female pattern baldness is different from that of male pattern baldness in that the frontal hairline remains unaffected except for normal recession, which happens to everyone as time passes, and hair loss rarely progresses to total or near total baldness, as it may in men,” Dr. Marc Glashofer, a dermatologist and fellow of the American Academy of Dermatology.

Alyscia Cunningham is a woman on a mission and her current mission concerns hair. Her book, I Am More Than My Hair: My Outer Appearance Does Not Define Me, has just been released and she is working on a documentary film based on the book. She recently contacted me because she knew I had an interest in health issues that impact men and women. Professionally, Alyscia is an entrepreneur, author, speaker, filmmaker and photographer who has contributed to National Geographic, Discovery Channel, America Online and the Smithsonian Institution. Personally, she describes herself as a granddaughter, daughter, wife, mother of three, sister, aunty, friend, artist, advocate, writer, Pisces, dreamer, truth seeker, positive thinker, adventurer, traveler, hiker, teacher, student.

Alyscia is hoping to use her photographs and film to celebrate the beauty of bald women while raising awareness of alopecia. The book features 138 portraits of 46 females and the stories of their experience with alopecia as well as females who cut their hair in solidarity of a loved one.

Cunningham held a fashion show last April featuring men, women and children who are bald either as a result of a medical condition or to support a loved one. The show’s aim was to raise funds for her documentary film. She was interviewed by Jamie Feldman, the Fashion and Lifestyle Editor at the Huffington Post.

She asked Cunningham what inspired her current project:

“I had long locs, past my waistline, for many years. People always connected me with my hair. Around the time I was getting ready to publish my first book, I started swimming. I started getting head colds because my hair wasn’t fully drying and I was having neck and back pain, I think because it was so heavy. At the same time, someone connected me with a woman who was part of an organization that raises money for women of color to get cancer treatments. She asked if I knew anyone who would be willing to get their hair cut and donated to the organization, and I did it. I was surprised how negative the response was.”

Left, Alyscia Cunningham gets her hair cut for charity in 2013. Right, Cunningham with short hair.

The negative response was widespread.

“People were so concerned about my hair and how I would look without it. Many people sent me emails saying ‘it’s not the right time’ and it didn’t fit with the branding for my book, Feminine Transitions: A Photographic Celebration of Natural Beauty. They told me my hair is beautiful. I asked one of the women who said that to me ― what would you tell your daughter if she involuntarily lost her hair? Would you tell her she is no longer beautiful? That was kind of a spark for me to start the project.”

When I spoke to her, Alyscia says she’s planning another project focused on Masculine Transitions and breaking stereotypes of male image. Alyscia Cunningham is an inspiration for all of us who want to be seen for being our unique selves, not forced to fit some societal image of what a woman or man is supposed to look like. Check out her work here.