Sex 6.0: Why Men and Women Are the Way They Are 

 February 15, 2019

By  Jed Diamond

Sex and love are topics of interest for all men and women. This has been true since the beginning of time. To say these issues have become controversial would be an understatement. The women’s movement has helped liberate both females and males. Now the men’s movement stepping into the spotlight. I’ve been doing men’s work since my son, Jemal, was born 50 years ago, in that iconic year, 1969. I write about it in a new book, just out, called Are You Still Listening, with a number of friends and colleagues. You can find out more here.

“1969 was extraordinary and galvanizing,” said Brent Green, the lead author of the book. “From Apollo 11 to Woodstock and Vietnam, indelible lessons from fifty years ago impact our national consciousness and priorities today.” It was also a time of social and sexual upheaval. In the chapter I wrote for the book, I talked about my involvement with Black Panthers and its founder, Huey P. Newton. I recalled the opening night of the musical Hair at the Orpheum Theater in San Francisco and the impact of the sexual revolution in my life, then and now.

In 1969 the women’s movement was in full swing and the men’s movement was just beginning. After 50 years on the fringe, the men’s movement has hit the mainstream. When I began doing men’s work in 1969 there were few others in the field. The First National Conference on Men and Masculinity took place at the University of Tennessee in 1975 and the men’s movement has grown slowly, but steadily, since then. Recently men’s issues have come out of the shadows into the light and men are stepping up to their greatness.

A December 2018 article in the New York Times highlighted two programs I’ve been working with, Evryman and The Mankind Project. A major article featuring Evryman recently appeared in Men’s Health Magazine. My colleague, Dan Doty, founder of Evryman, appeared twice on the Today Show. The #MeToo movement has challenged the old patriarchal system and Gillette has recently aired controversial ads in support of a changing role for men. Mark Greene, Senior Editor at The Good Men Project, where I’ve been associated since they began ten years ago, has written The Little #MeToo Book for Men.

In January 2019, an opinion piece in The Washington Post, by former New York Times reporter, Andrew L. Yarrow, offers reasons “Why Progressives Should Stop Avoiding Men’s Issues” and conservative psychologist Jordan Peterson’s videos on sex and gender have been seen by over a hundred million, mostly male, viewers.

Millions of men are waking up to the reality that they need to change their lives, but they are confused and need guidance. Women also hunger to understand what is going on with men today and what men really need to feel great again. My new book, Men Alive: 12 Rules for Living Fully, Loving Deeply, and Making a Difference in the World will be published later this year and will support men on their journey.

It’s evident to everyone who is willing to see the truth that women still suffer from sexual discrimination, harassment, and abuse. When sexual differences have been used to restrict the potential of one sex, it isn’t surprising that some people would like to eliminate differences. The problem with that approach is it won’t work. Science tells us that men and women are different. A better approach, I believe, would be for us to accept our differences and do everything we can to ensure that differences aren’t used to harm women or men, but to enhance sexual equality.

Marianne J. Legato, M.D. is an internationally known physician and researcher scientist. She is the founder of the Foundation for Gender-Specific Medicine and author of numerous ground-breaking books including Why Men Never Remember and Women Never Forget, Why Men Die First: How to Lengthen Your Lifespan, and Eve’s Rib: The New Science of Gender-Specific Medicine and How It Can Save Your Life.

“Everywhere we look,” says Dr. Legato, “the two sexes are startlingly and unexpectedly different not only in their internal function but in the way they experience illness.” On her website she details a few of the differences that modern science now knows about males and females:

  1. The Male and Female Brain
  • Men have larger brains; women have more brain cells.
  • Men and women use different parts of their brains while thinking.
  • Because of the later maturation in males of the part of the brain that weighs risks and moderates impulsive behavior, adolescent boys are more likely than girls to take life-threatening risks, commit suicide and die violently than girls of the same age.
  1. The Female and Male Heart
  • Men have larger hearts; women’s hearts beat faster.
  • Heart disease presents differently in men and women: men feel a crushing pain in their chest; 15% of women experience fleeting pain in the upper abdomen or back, nausea, shortness of breath, and sweating.
  • Men who are diagnosed with heart disease are typically ten years younger than women.
  1. The Male and Female Lungs
  • Even when corrected for body size, men’s lungs are bigger than women’s.
  • It is more dangerous for women to smoke than for men. For the same number of cigarettes smoked, women are 20 to 70 percent more likely than men to develop lung cancer.
  • A man takes 12 breaths per minute while a woman takes only nine breaths per minute on average.
  1. The Female and Male Immune System
  • Because they have more active immune systems, women have the ability to fight off viral infections better than men.
  • Men are more susceptible to parasitic infestations than women because of their higher levels of testosterone, which promotes parasite breeding rates.
  1. The Male and Female Digestive System
  • Dose for dose, women are more susceptible to intoxication from alcohol.
  • Food takes twice as long to pass through the digestive system of women compared with that of men.
  • Women are more likely than men to feel overly full after eating and have more problems with bloating and gas immediately following a meal.
  1. Female and Male Mortality
  • Because of their greater biologic vulnerability and the fact that society assigns men the most dangerous jobs, men are six years younger than women when they die.
  • Boy babies are twice as likely to die before birth than girls. Although approximately 240 males are conceived for every 100 girls, the ratio of boys to girls at birth is 1.05 to 1.
  • Pancreatic cancer occurs three times more frequently in men than in women. Estrogen and progesterone appear to protect women from pancreatic cancer.

1969 was a seminal and sexy year, a wonderful time to celebrate sex, sexual diversity, peace, and love. I still remember the songs from Hair–Aquarius, I Believe in Love, I Got Life, Hello Sunshine and the themes that moved us at the time: Peace, political protests, clean air, and sexual equality. Those issues were worth fighting for in 1969 and they are worth fighting for today.

If you were around then or want to get a feel for the times, check out our book, Are You Still Listening, http://1969stories.com/. You’ll also be supporting those of us who are still here and doing the work, my fellow writers, Brent Green, Carol Orsborn, Richard Adler, David Cogswell, Robert William Case, Greg Dobbs, and Bob Moses.

Best Wishes,

Jed Diamond


Founder and VHS (Visionary Healer Scholar) of MenAlive

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